New love
by Golden-Garden
Summary: This is a Sarumisa fanfiction so if yaoi's not your thing, then turn around XD . I try my best to make this enjoyable for you ease enjoy :) -Golden Garden *w*
1. Chapter 1

**Hi!~ I'm really new to this, so some corrections, or idea's are needed!Thank you for reading this, and I hope you're happy with it. -Golden Garden *w***

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I speed walk with my head down the street wishing my apartment was closer. I just finished a fight with the stupid monkey, and although I wasn't really the one who stopped it, I'm still pleased it's over with, his annoying word's scratch my heart, and peirce my soul. Trying to walk faster I almost walk out onto the street and get hit by a car but I bring myself out of thought just in time. 'The way words roll off his tougne, they are starting to scare me.' I think to myself trying to understand this nagging feeling in my chest. In the end I cant fin any other word's to describe the feeling other then being scared of him. 'I want to see him.' I catch myself thinking and try to shake it out of my head. 'I must be going crazy.' I reassure myself. 'I'm going crazy because of 's all his fault.'

Eventually I reach my apartment the Autum air scratching at my cheek's and nose. I reach into my right pant's pocket, pulling out the key's and unlocking the door. Stepping through the door is heavenly as warmth reaches every part of my body it can mangae to, it's not especially warm in here, but it's better then outside, 'what a cold day.' I tell myself happy I at least have a jacket.

I kick off my shoes and throw my jacket onto a hanger in the closet. My usual black tank top is pretty much stuck to my body with disgusting cold sweat from the fight. I sigh and walk to the bathroom my whole body aching imensely , as if the fight were still going on.

Closing the bathroom door I turn on the shower and strip down while waiting for the water to heat up. I stick my hand in checking the temperature and then step in opening and then closing the white shower curtain.

Feeling the hot water run across my torso and down my leg's let's me release a content sigh. I turn around letting my back be coated in the warmth, and then my hair as well. A warm, passionate smile is what I feel form on my lip's. As I wash my hair I run over the fight in my mind, his movement's are so vivid as if I'm still fighting him.

His pained face when I told...Well, shouted at him, 'I'm sick of you!', toy's with my brain a little. I've never seen him make that face...Except one other time, back when we were still friend's. He had the same face when we had gotten into a fight about me trying to get a girlfriend, in the end it didn't work out for me and her, and Saru apologized.

Turning the shower off, I open the curtain allowing the left over steam to hit my body slowly cooling me down. Part of me wishes that we were still friends but I push the thought away feeling stupid. 'Friend's with that beast?I wouldn't last three seconds.' I assure myself making sure the thought will never trouble me again.

Drying my leg's, torso, arm's, and hair, just enough so that I'm not dripping all over the floor is a wise choice due to last time's slip-across-the-bathroom-floor-stunt. I walk to the mirror and write "HOMURA" in the steam filled mirror with capital letter's before wiping it down enough to see my hair, as I dry and comb it. Exiting the bathroom and going to my bedroom is a frozen hell. Reaching the door I throw on boxer's and a tank top as fast as possible while goose bump's coat my arms.

'Damn!Why the heck is it so cold!?' I ask myself as I consider putting a blanket around myself while I get something to eat. In the end I decide not to because it would be pointless if there's a blanket on the couch, even if it isn't as warm.

Eventually I exit my bedroom somewhat warmer because I was sitting over a vent, and as I do the first thing I get myself is some hot chocolate, one of the few warm things to devour left in this small cold apartment. Soon I have a full cup in my hand and I'm watching cartoons on a low volume. I take a look out the window seeing the dark sky that feels empty for some reason, I try to decipher my feelings but cant, so, like always, I push it away.

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Waking up I can still feel my bones ache from yesterday. Groaning I roll to face the ceiling and take a deep breath, the air is unforgiving, but warmer then yesterday so I cant complain. I feel a pain in my chest, not something that stings, or aches, it burns, I feel like I might melt away out of sadness and embarrassment, but with no reason. This has been going on for half a year, I cant recal what happened that might cause it, but I know I just need to sit and rest until it goes away, same as every other time.

Eventually the pain stops after one hour and I can move again, I grab my coffee mug I had used last night and wash it out. Sighing I drop my face into my plams and lean against the sink edge trying to think straight and orgnaize myself. Today being a normal day, there isn't much I need to do, I might head down to Homura later but for now, I need to rest, Something is hurting me, so I need to sleep it away.

It's been four hour's since I moved to go wash out that cup. I look at the clock pinned to my wall above the crappy T.V showing the news, and pull the blanket that clong's to me, up to my chin. '12:00' I almost whisper the words but my mouth will only move not say anything. I don't know why this feeling is stopping me from thinking straight but it's deffinetly something I'm not framiliar with. I remember how when mom left dad the first time, he refused to move, he had stopped eating, he looked as if not a thought was in his head, he quit his job, he started heavily drinking. I push away those gross thought's remembering I never have to deal with those people again.

Rolling I refuse to face the T.V not wanting to hear or see anything going on outside, why should it matter to me, it's just mentioning unfortunate people anyway. 'They have nothing to do with me.' I assure myself not wanting to become infactuated with people getting hurt and dying. The T.V is almost getting louder the more I try to block it out, and so I eventually snap and roll over throwing the blanket off me and turning it off.

All I want to do is go to sleep, so I do. I fall into a deep sleep, I watch myself and Saru smiling, laughing, playing games, chatting, and I feel a warm feeling in my heart, the bad feelings melt away, I watch myself tease him, and I stare as he plays pranks on me, neither of them able to see the me now. Then I see Saru and I fighting, just that one time had we ever fought. I watch myself get turned down, I watch Saru comfort me and keep me standing. And then I watch as he Scratchs that one special mark on his chest, burning it away, I watch myself walk away, I watch us become enemies.

I wake up and tear's are all over my face, I cant figure out why, he had done something terrible, I had to leave him behind, there was nothing else I could do. Not being able to stop the tears I start to choke on my breath a little, I sniffle, and let the tears block my vision. Snappign out of it, I nearly laugh at myself, 'This isn't me!I'm better then this!Tear's don't rule me, I'm stronger, and more fulfilled then those who let tear's fall down their face!' I convince myself standing up. It's 3:00 in the afternoon now and I can finally stand up straight.

My phone ring's on the counter making the whole table shake underneath it. I bend over and pick it up, pressing the talk button and pressing it to my ear. "Hello~" I hear in a stupidly up beat tone. I consider just hanging up but I know he'll call again. "What do you want stupid monkey?" I growl into the phone as I walk to my bedroom door and walk in. "I just wanna know where little Misaki is. After all you didn't show up at that stupid thing your 'friends' got into." At first his voice had chirped but it dropped to sarcastic, pitiful, and instagating near the end. "Don't call me that!"I hiss into the phone. "MI~SA~KI~" he chuckles into the phone in a teasing voice. furious I hang up the phone and throw it on my bed as I close the door lightly behind me. Going to my closet, I throw it open and get a pair of pants on and change my tank top. I search for my sweater and my phone goes crazy with text's, one afteer the other all from the same stupid monkey. Turning the sound off I find my sweater and throw it on, when I head back to my phone I see 42 new text's. All of them ask where I am, what I'm doing, where I'm heading, why I'm going there, and when can we chat. The last few I don't expect but don't care, I continue ignoring the text' get ready

I head to base and am greeted with happy faces, I assume the plan was success. "Yatta!You missed the fun!" Kamamoto laugh's throwing his arm over my I walk over to the couch with him and they give me the details, until one question bashes into my ear drums and making me try to think of an excuse. "I was up really late so I woke up around 12:00. After that I couldn't find my phone so I didn't know anything was being carried out, I just rested some more, the stupid monkey gave me trouble yesterday." I say making it up as I go along.

Soon I get a call so I take out my phone and chat a bit with someone proposing a job for homura to carry out, in the end I turn it down and stupidly throw my phone on the table. Getting up to go get a drink I come back to see Kamamoto holding my phone out to me. "You gonna answer any of these?" he ask's, obviously not reading who they were from because he said it with a smile on his face. Snatching the phone from his grip with a small frown on my face I read aloud "134 new messages" under my breath. Sitting down Kamamoto look's at me like I'm an idiot. I ignore him and take a sip of my pop feeling it quench the thirst I only just realized I had. "It's rude not to answer, you should text them back." Kamamoto says calmly and with giving him a death stare I drop my head 'Fine fatty!' I think to myself picking my phone back up and trying not to just break it.

'Stop bugging me, stupid goddamn monkey :).' I send calmly trying not to completely loose it. We go on with the conversation when I get the pain in my chest again, I nearly drop my drink but I hold onto it and pretend that nothing's wrong.

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Soon I'm walking to the convenience store getting dinner for me, myself, and I. Each step is something that makes me question why the hell I keep getting those pains, I wonder what they are, but something inside me is telling me I already know.

I end up buying three noodle cups, a meat bun, pocky, a bag of chips, and a bottle of pop. Realizing how hungry I really am I, I snatch the pocky out of one of my bags and tear it open with my teeth. Eventually I get home and smash my hand against the light making the lights flicker on like a horror movie. I walk in and kick off my shoes, drop my bags and throw off my jacket.

Later I find myself still unshowered, watching horror movie on my couch, with bags of candy and drinking pop. I feel like a glutton, but wouldn't mind putting on a few pounds, if fatty can still move I'll be able to.

The jump scare is aout to come up when an idiot enters through the balcony making me flip out. Looking to see Saru walking towards me is the scariest crap ever. I've pushed myself against the one armrest and am trying to calm myself down so I can kick his ass, but before I know it Saruhiko has me pinned down on my own couch. I wiggle underneath him desiring escape. His grip tightens and I let out a small yelp unintentionally. "I haven't seen you all day Misaki..." He trails off speaking softly in my ear. Trying to shake him off all I manage to do is knock the two small square pillows off the couch along with the blanket."I told you not to call me that!"I growl at him in a anger filled voice. He smiles down at me mocking my inability to move.

Trying again and again to flip him off me, he presses his hands harder against my wrists. 'Struggle is futile.' my brain tells me, but I don't give in, the couch is wobbling and Saruhiko brings his face closer to mine to kill my pride. I catch myself stop struggling but I cant start again, I'm helpless, and screaming isn't an option for me.I refuse to give in.

Suddenly I feel something warm pressing against my lips in a way that's almost brutal. Opening my eye's I see the stupid monkey's eye's closed and immediatly know what's going first I resist but I start falling into it, 'No, STOP!I need to fight back!' I tell myself, but I'm unable to.

After that kiss he removes himself and turn's to leave. I jump up and throw my hands around his waist. "Wait!"I tell him and he look's down to me with a surprised look painted over his usual crazed face. "Are you drunk?"He ask's me and I become offened again. I clench my fists releasing his waist. "Hell no!"I shout at him and he turns to me talking two steps forward and kissing me again. One of his hands slip to my pants and his other pulling me close. He does nothing but kiss me until he releases and I fall to the floor. He exits using the balcony and I'm left sitting there like an idiot."Don't make a fool of me!"I hiss under my breath. Slowly but surely I creep back to my warm couch, laying down and switching the channel to some old cartoons.

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**Hi!I hope you enjoyed this Sarumisa!I was just sitting around wondering what I should write, and this popped into mind!I'm coming up with idea's on how it should go, so if you have any ideas send me a review!Thank you for reading -Golden Garden *w***


	2. Chapter 2

**Oh my...I just realized that I wrote 'ease' instead of 'please' in the description!I'm sorry for all of my mistakes, (I made quite a few in the last chapter). I hope you can enjoy this chapter a little more. I wrote the end of the last chapter at 3:00 A.M and got myself stuck right after a kissing scene by accident!I didn't plan to have one this early but I'll try to work with it. This chapter is going to be in Saruhiko's POV I hope this turns out okay!**

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"SA-RU-HI-KO!" Is the name the stupid lady blasts from her lips causing some spit to land on my face, and causing me to become irritated. I look up and rub my eye's, I look around, I'm still at work. Groaning I face my computer screen and continue typing nonsense I don't care about. Normally I would bother to care somewhat about what was going on with us but today was not one of those days, after kissing Misa yesterday I have no idea on how to not think about him all day.

My mind ends up wandering to Misaki as I hit the key's with force, and the annoying sun peeks out from behind the now pulled back curtains. I click my tounge in annoyance at the stupid blond, but I go right back to work not wanting another retarded lecture about how I need to respect my higher-ups. I have never liked Awashima's lectures, nor have I payed attention, and I'm not starting today...Or ever.

'Misaki...Misaki...Misaki' His name wanders my mind as does his face. I think of last night, I remember how he barely fought back, and didn't even care much about me stealing his first kiss. 'Why...Goddamn sometimes he just plain confuses me!' Attempting to fathom why he wouldn't even use his powers is impossible, did he even notice that I used mine to burn his wrists?if he did, he sure as hell didn't care. I tap the keys lighter now, I cant figure him out, no matter how precious he is to me, has he changed? Gorwn up? Does he not care about my child-like pranks anymore? Was he just shocked? Is he sick of me? Is he just really upset with me? Why wont he come for revenge? Is he waiting for the right time to attack me? If that's the case how is he watching me? Is he here? How did I not notice him? To many questions are filling my brain, so I let out a sigh and try to clear them all out.

Eventually I escape the living hell and go back to my apartment. My place is a lot fancier and bigger then Misaki's, it also has heating so it's no where near as freezing as his place, last night would've been longer if it wasn't for that fact. I now enter the front doors and block out the sound of cars and drug addicts hanging around outside. Walking to the elevator I get the same strange looks as every other day, not that I cant see why they look at me like that when I'm wearing a uniform like this. 'Oh well.' I think as I step into the warm elevator with mirror walls, a stupid child keeps whining to their mom about some toy on the way up, I nearly loose it but we get to my floor and I happily escape. I enter a tan hallway with diamond shapes all down the carpet in different shades of brown. 'Stupid design.' I think as I fish out my keys after reaching my door.

The living room air floods out the door, it's thick and warm, it reminds me of Misa for some reason, but I don't care, I just want to relax. I kick off my shoes and close the door, normally I'd fix how messy my shoes were, but today I'm just going to sit back and relax, I have been dealing with stupid shit all day, I need a break before I loose my marbles. Looking to the clock I read '6:00 P.M.' I sigh. "Great, my whole day, wasted!" I had intended to whisper but the end became louder, not that I cared.

I take a pop out of the fridge and open it with one hand as I go to the couch and lay down. The pillows are uncofortable against my back, and the coushins even more so. Squirming for a bit is useless, I cant find a comfortable position, so soon enough I'm sitting upright and watching idiotic actors on a drama with a murder I've already solved in my head. Natrually at the end I find out I'm right and let out a sigh of boredom, and turn off the T.V.

I stand up and crack my back before going to the bathroom and taking a hot shower. I strip down and turn out the water, while waiting for it to heat up I neatly fold my clothes. Entering the shower is bliss. While I let hot water paint my back I fantasize of Misaki. He's adorable in every situation, but while were fighting he's beautiful, his eye's light up in such a way that it can remind me of when we used to laugh together, his eye's used to light up the same way.

Eventually I exit the shower and dry off. loosely I throw a towel around my waist and bursh my hair and teeth, I do anything I really need to besides eat dinner, before I flop down on my bed and inhale the smell of Lavender which is leaking from my bed sheets. Soon enough I'm asleep and dreaming, but of course I dream of him.

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Misaki smiles at me and we share left over chocolates I got from some girls. "Why do you always turn them down? they don't look bad, and their personalities are decent." Misa says to me pushing a chocolate heart through his pink lips. I smile at him, "I have someone else I love." I tell him nonchalantly. He looks at me and drops a chocolate, "Really!?Who!?"He asks in an excited tone. Nodding I let out a sigh, "I cant say, but I'll let you know if it works out between us." I plainly tell him making him puff up his cheeks somewhat angry at first, but it changes. "Okay, let me know before anyone else!I hope it works out for you two." His smile is soul peircing, I go red and turn to face the window smiling. "Okay."

Awoken by a retarded alarm I slam down on it, and cover my eyes with my forearm. My thoughts run wild over Misaki and I stand up. My dark blue pajama pants are removed and a fresh pair of underwear and uniform pants are thrown on, my plain white shirt is thrown over my bare chest along with deoderant. I frown not wanting to go to work but I suck it up. Entering the hallway is nice because the floor is heated. Not really wanting to move I make my way to the kitchen and make a cup of coffee.

Eventually I'm out the front door and sluggishly walking to work. Of course watching a kid trip and fall is fun so I get into a more up-beat mood.

I'm happy until I someone thing I cant stand! Kamamoto who is walking around with Misaki, 'Damn fatty!' I don't want to go anywhere near them but seeing them happy draws me in. I run over and begin taunting Misa. My grin grows as he gets pissed and attacks. His fire barely scratches me but when it does it feels great. My smile becomes close to demented as his attacks kepp just barely hitting but feel amazing when they do. My back, legs, arms, chest, neck, I want him to bite them, stab them, lick them. By now I'm blushing, Misaki fills my brain and his name falls from my lips "MI~SA~KI~" I sing with an obviously disturbing smile and my eye's filled with lust.

Misaki growls and blush coats his cheeks generously. Every part of me wants him, I become faster, stronger, more feirce. "Don't call me that!"He shouts and I throw a dagger at him making him yelp in pain. My cheeks are bright red by now, my eye's practically swirling, and my lips forming a eagar smile.

He get's more and more angry as I try to cut him up, I want him to scream my name, I want him to love me. My face grows hot and I eventually am stopped yet again by the big busted blond, Awashima. Everything melts, I really do hate her with a passion. Clicking my tounge I don't listen to word she says and at the obvious end of her babling I leave the area and go to work.

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It couldn't be more boring here, but I stick around until the end of my shift anyways. At the end of the disgusting mess most people call work, I begin heading home.

As I walk by the convience store I smile, Misaki is in there. I plan out everything in my head and wait for him outside around the corner. He exits the store and I smile, I rpobably look crazy but I don't care. When he walks by the ally I'm standing in, I grab his wrist and flip him around pushing him against the wall, and grabing his other wrist. He drops his bag to the ground and blushs hard. Sliding my leg in between his makes me smile and him blush. This time he doesn't fight back at all, he seems like he cant process anything that's going on.

He has a blank look on his face like a confused child trying to understand the situation. "Are the wheels even turning in that small head of yours?" I tease, and he goes bright red clenching his teeth and fists.

"Shut up stupid monkey!Of course I understand what going on! I'm not an idiot!" He whispers angry and red. I raise an eyebrow and smile, "I disagree, you are an idiot" I chirp happily and in a teasing manner.

He trys to step forward but fails because I push him back. He gets angry and struggles but doesn't use his powers. "I'm NOT an Idio-!" I cut off his shouting with a forceful kiss and he whines once closing his eyes and completely relaxing. I snicker once and push harder against his lips and gently rub my knee and thigh against his. "If you understand why are you not resisting?" I ask him with a wide and ridiculously happy smile as I pull my lips away from his, but stay close.

His eye's widen and he looks flustered. Our surroudings have fallen silent the sun is almost done setting. He looks me in the eye. I hold my breath and my smile falls. It's cold now, the moon shines down on us and his lips open to say something. I'm intrigued, I shiver and were both serious. I look at him intensly. And nothing moves as he begins to say something.

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**Sorry for the cliff hanger, I'm makign this as interesting as I can and I don't know if it's working so I thought I'd leave you waiting for now XD. I hope you are enjoying these chapters as much as I enjoy writing them! I bid you farewell for now :) -Golden Garden *w***


	3. Chapter 3

_**The amount of spelling mistakes I made in the last chapter...Is insane...I try really hard, I promise!My word pad has NO spell-check so I'm stuck in a really bad spot!It took me forever just to start writing, I got sick, my computer was being skippy and slow, it's been crazy for me. I hope you all enjoy this chapter, and I hope that I can stop making stupid mistakes. This is Misaki's POV.-Golden *w***_

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I'm frozen, the words I desire to say, they wont come out. My heart starts to skip beats, my eyes are fixed with Saru's. "Saruhiko...I..." My stuttering wont stop no matter how hard I try. Weight begins pulling me down, my body doesn't fall but my insides do, everything is still. My world and the real one align. Neither move, I can barely breathe. All thoughts drift away from me.

Opening my mouth for the 1,000th time, I'm at a standstill. I cant understand what's going on anymore, I lose everything, I'm overflowing with something that doesn't make sense to me. Holding my breath I bring my face an inch away from his. My head is racing with 10,000 thoughts all at the same time.

"Saruhiko...You..." I cant say anything, my whole body is fighting against my minds desire to run away. My limbs are stiff like the pavement beneath our feet. The world is only lit by moonlight and street lamps. A poster for an old concert rustles in the wind behind Saru. wanting to break away is pointless, everything I want, and control has left me behind. Suddenly everything comes back to me, but now my need to run is gone. I just want him beside me.

Breaking I leave everything I bought behind, I run as fast as my legs can carry me, everything I feel, I cant think of a reason for it. '_great!I left him back there, with all of my stuff, because I decided to be a girl, and ran away!I don't even know what to do now._' Next it only takes me a minute to realize, I have no idea where I am or how to get home. "UGH!" Seeps out of my throat and through my lips. My heart cant take anymore running, I can barely see, this part of town has no streetlamps so all I have to guide me is the moon light.

Sitting at a bus stop to catch my breath is wise. As I sit down I realize just how tired I am from running ten blocks in the wrong direction. All I want to do is be at home and sit down on my cold sofa, while I watch a stupid cartoon. '_I want these feelings to go away, they get in the way of everything I do!_' I complain to myself. I sit and get so tired, I end up falling asleep on the cold bus stop bench, my leg's pressed up to my chest. I don't even know how I do it, but I'm in a deep sleep.

What wakes me up is Izumo, I have no frickin' clue why he would be out this late but I don't care. "Thanks." I say to him standing up and stretching. "I hope that wasn't sarcasam" He laughs to me and I shake my head."What're you doing out here, sleeping on a bench?" He asks me in a teasing manner, his voice rising near the end in an honest question.

I frown at him. "What about you?Shouldn't you be at your precious bar?" I ask him in a laugh and he nods with a sigh. "I was getting some stuff for the other guys, it's 1:00 A.M but they refuse to go home. Girlfriends and such, they bother the guys to no end." He says to me with a sigh seeping from his lips. Shivering a little, I look up at him. "Oh please, love sounds easy." I tell him in a laugh, I meant it to be sarcasam, but he takes me litterally. "I wouldn't be so sure, love isn't just, confessing, and a happy ending, some people don't even know how to react to feelings, while others are to straightforward. It's a bothersome thing." He tells me with a laugh as we begin walking together.

"Whatever you need to take me home, I have no frickin' clue where I am or how to get home from here." I tell him in a small irratated laugh. He gives me the funniest look ever and closses his eye's. He begins laugh at me and I nudge his ribcage making him laugh even more. "How the hell did you even get out here!?" He asks me in a mocking tone as his laughter continues. "Um, I ran until my feet couldn't carry me anymore." I half laugh as we walk side by side. My hands sit in my pockets and his hang by his sides. He stares at me worried, and for a second looks me up and down for wounds.

"It wasn't because of a fight!I'm not stupid enough to start a fight this early! I just...Left the store and Saru played a trick on me, so I ran here." I tell him mumbling a little every so often as my feet continue hitting the ground. "The store?How long were you been sleeping there?" He asks quickly in a worried tone. We turn a corner and I smile up at him sheepishly. "I have no clue." I say flatly.

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Soon were at my apartment and Izumo is saying goodbye. I've already kicked off my shoes, so I wave to him as he walks down the hall to the elevator. Shutting the door is almost a slam. All I can think about is Saru, he begins to fill up my brain again. I can only see his face if I shut my eyes. Wanting to cry for no good reason, I storm to the bathroom and slam the door. I abandon all of my clothing, I turn on the hot water and jump into the shower, I nearly burn off all of my skin, but I really don't care anymore.

I cant think straight anymore. After spending an hour in the shower I try to convince myself into getting out. Eventually I remove myself, I dry off insanely fast and my skin is still red from the heat. Brushing my teeth and hair, I get out of the bathroom in my towel, and walk down the hall to my bedroom. It's like a frozen tundra but it doesn't bug me that much, my rage nearly burns a path as I walk.

I reach my door and fling it open slaming it behind me. Before I know it I'm dressed in my pajamas and on the couch drinking pop, and eating pocky. My day feels like a waste though I cant understand why.

A knock comes to the door as I sit on my cold couch surrounded by a bunch of pillows I set near me for warmth, to lazy to heat myself up. My body shakes a little as I stand up and walk to the door. The world shakes in my head, the floor feels like ice as I open the standing in front of me makes me immediatly feel stupid. I cant explain it but I feel helpless somehow. Standing in my Boxers and tank top, while he's in my doorway, it makes me feel helpless and stupid.

"What do you want stupid monkey!?Actually, just go away, I don't want to see your stupid face!" I say to him but he lifts up my bags that he brought with him, and walks right in. Kicking off his shoes he walks into the kitchen and sets down my bags. "Hey!Get out of my house!Thank you for bringing my bags back...But get out!" I try to shout quietly but it comes out just as loud as usual. He walks over and shuts the door before pulling me over to the couch by my wrist.

"Oi!" I shout at him and he pulls me down beside him as he sits in the center of the couch. "Cant you give me a while just to rest, I'm pestered everywhere I go. So can you forget everything, and let us go back to being good friends again?" His question burns my chest. I shut my mouth and rest my head on his shoulder.

His face becomes confused for a moment but goes back to normal, he smiles as we watch stupid cartoons. My hands tighten into fists. I watch him carefully. "As soon as I need to go to Homra, you get out, understand?" I ask him and he looks down at me for a second before smiling. "I'll gladly stay by your side until then." He sings flipping me down against the couch.

"W-W-What?What is it?" I ask trying not to shake under him. He lays on top of me resting his head beside mine as our boddies lay pressed together. "Resting." He says quietly into my ear making me shiver under him.

I push up making him groan as we sit up legs tangled. Grabbing a blanket I push him over and lay beside him trying my best to not push him off the couch. He pulls me so I half rest on his body and the blanket covers us both nicely. "Cute." He laughs quietly making me blush. Suddenly I stop and think. '_Wait...I'm acting like a lovey dovey teenage girl...What the heck is going on!?_' I ask myself but I cant move. He's warm under me so I tell myself it's just for warmth and being a good person. However the way our legs sit makes me feel like I'm 16 again. My heart beats faster then I want it to, and I pray he cant feel it.

Soon enough he falls asleep next to me. I cant help but feel strange but I lean close feeling his breath against my forhead. His lips are only slightly parted so only small breaths come out, but their warm, it makes me feel whole some how. All of the bad things have come to melt away. I lean closer and closer, just wanting the warmth to grow. Soon I move up and press my head to his, I realize soon that our lips are right next to each other. I sit their for around 10 minutes.

Something in my head clicks and I jump off his lips and lay back down. I begin second guessing everything about myself. I fall asleep wondering what I'm going to do now.

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Soon enough were both awake and I'm pretending nothing happened. He leaves and so do I. Running as if I'm late it's only 11:00 AM. Missing him makes me feel awful. I don't know what I want anymore. I've never been more lost.

all I want is to make sure that I can face him again without losing my sanity. Nothing has ever hurt more then it does now. All I want is for him to smile, I don't know why, all of my hate has fadded, I probably couldn't even pretend to be mad at him. Right now he's the most important thing to me and I don't know why.

I'm tired of thinking, the only explanation, it stings a little. _Love_. I cant even stand thinking about it. I don't want it to be love, I want it to be that I'm sick, or confused, or at least in love with someone, in fact ANYONE besides him!

Storming into base I throw my body on the couch. "Hey!Yatta!What's going on?" Asks a stupidly happy Kamamoto. His hands are filled with chips and half of a bottle of pop. I frown at that but it makes me laugh. "Nothing, and you?" I ask not making any attempt at being rude towards him. A few members look over and I sit still and not caring. "Nothing really. Are you feeling alright?" He asks and I swat his hand away when he reaches to my head with the back of his hand facing me. "What just cause I'm not threatening you I'm sick?Maybe I'm just growing up." I say with a small pout as I sit happily but a little angry on the inside.

A small laughter starts around me and I go red. "HEY!"I say and Fatty laughs patting my head in a small motion, to him just moving his hand is exhuasting so it doesn't last long.

I smile at all of them and Anna walks over putting her hand to my head. "Not you too..." I sigh lifting her hand and setting it by her side. "I'm doing fine, okay?I'm just tired, and lazy." I say laying back against the couch.

I thank the lord that Izumo hasn't said anything about last night. I happily make my way to a pop can and I drink it slowly as I walk back over and sit down. I don't include myself in to much conversation and worry about Saru constantly.

I blank out on everyone three times before its dinner.

As soon as the food is brought back, I dig in. I'm a wild animal after only having a pop can all day. Not caring how many odd looks I get I eat noodles like there's no tomorrow. Kamamoto laughs when I noodle hits me in the face after I eat so fast.I knock him on the back of the head and continue my meal.

Once our meal is done, I'm on my way home. I stumble a little exhuasted with my day. The walk home is annoying with all the stares I get. It's only 7:00 but I feel like I haven't slept for two days. My head hurts a little as I walk into my apartment. I don't even take off my shoes, I just dive onto my couch and sigh before turning on the T.V and curling up under a blanket.

The air has gotten colder again, I hate Autumn, Winter, and Spring, they are way to cold for me. It should stay Summer all the time. I'm done with the cold, all I can do now is sit under my blanket and hopefully hibernate until I'm normal again, no matter how many years away that may be.

I think about Saruhiko day after day. Some time around three weeks pass, and I start losing count of the days I'm still moving, I either spend them at home thinking about Saru, or at Homra thinking about Saru. I don't do any patroling, but since it's January, I wouldn't have to do much anyway.

For now I sit on my butt, on my couch, in my freezing cold house, snuggling a stupid pillow, while watching Tom & Jerry, pointing out all of the mistakes they made, drinking a full bottle of pop all by myself. I wonder what I'm sitting around for but it doesn't last long before I stop thinking about it again.

I sit in my usual black tank top and shorts. I spent all day at Homra 'planning' out new routes to patrol, It was long and boring so sitting here is the high light of my day.

"Saruhiko...I miss you." I whine under my breath wishing that we were back in Junior high goofing off at our desks. I wish that he was shooting spit balls at the teacher, and that I was passing notes. I wish that we were walking beside each other smiling. Moaning slightly and as quietly as I possibly can I hug the pillow tightly and flop on my side burrying my face in it.

My mind goes blank and I lay still. I miss him so much, that it hurts when he's far away.'_I wonder what he's doing, who he's with, when I'm going to see him again._' I think to myself as I lay my eye's covered by the pillow and my body feeling like a feather.

'_Being a teenager is so stupid, I don't understand it!I wish that I could be an adult, forget that, a senior citizen they know what they're doing!_' I think, wishing that it would all go away.

Wondering how he feels about me makes me fall asleep slowly but I don't really notice it until I'm dreaming of him yet again.

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_**Bleh!It's short and silly, but I try really hard, and it sucks when you cant concentrate. I know its short, and REALLY late but I hope you haven't lost interest!I promise things will get more interesting, it's difficult constantly switching POV's for each chapter. Reviewing is EXTREMELY appreciated, constructive critisisim is a HUGE plus, and I hope that you enjoyed this and will enjoy the rest of the chapters I write. 3 -Golden garden *w***_


	4. Chapter 4

_**thanks for sticking with me so far! I'm always super surprised when I see new reviews and followers, it makes me so happy to think that you are all enjoying it! (I'll mention everyone who reviewed at the end!) I'm sorry if it is getting dragged out a little, my inspiration has NOT been great recently... Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter \(o)/**_

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**Saruhiko POV**

My desk is cold under my elbows and it makes me shiver a little. Misaki and I haven't spoken since three weeks ago, and I'm trapped worrying for him. He's not on patrol anymore, I'm not even sure if he's getting my texts. Misaki takes a moment to be the only thing in my mind. It warms me a little to think of him, everything about him is truly beautiful. _'I wonder if he'll ever figure out about my feelings. It's odd that no matter how straight forward I am, he never seems to REALLY acknowledge my feelings. I wonder if he knows how important he really is to me.'_ I think to myself. Snapping out of it makes my heart burn. _'I only left so I could be something you noticed. The only reason I'm not standing along side you, is because you don't notice me.'_ That thought makes me get up and exit Scepter 4's building. Nobody questions me, nobody ever did, they were all to scared. That small idea that they feared me let me laugh to myself a little before I went off on my own little search.

As I walked I thought about Scepter 4. _'Why does it make me laugh when I think about how they fear me?'_ The thought weighed me down for a while. I walked through everywhere, I searched for him in random areas, and places I thought he might be. _' Oh, I guess it makes me laugh because, I'm not much stronger then everyone else, so seeing everyone cower by before something perhaps even smaller then them, is a funny thought.'_ My mind wandered as did the rest of me. Before I knew it I was going through places I had already been. Right now this was not a search for Misaki, I already had a feeling I knew where he was, right now it was just a stroll, and endless loop, and for no reason other than to stall.

I thought about how fragile and adorable Misaki was, I thought about the days of junior High, It is probably worse for me just to remember things, but I cant seem to help it. My thoughts are that of us running around, goofing off, playing video games, and talking. Even though they are simple things to remember they're still warm, and fun filled. I began to wonder what Misaki thought of the past, if he missed it like I did, or if he was content moving forward.

soon enough I found myself in front of his apartment, I knew that I had to talk with him, what to say to him was bigger issue, it's not like I'm really aware on why we are spliting apart, _'well, what am I supposed to say "Hey I don't know what we are fighting about but lets make up okay?" How stupid.' _ I tell myself with a frown. I begin to think that he's just grown up, that he's sick of playing childish games, he's found someone he loves and is ready to move on, and leave me behind.

The thoughts sting like nothing I've ever known, it's not painful, but disturbing, I cant decide if its disturbing because, I don't want him to move on, or because he might be moving on already. Even though I'm a little shaky I walk into the apartment using his key I had taking for emergencies on the way out a few weeks ago.

Soon I'm going up to his floor on the stupidly loud elevator. Nothing I can think of sounds right, no matter how many times I think it through, not one thing sounds like something I should say. Soon enough I'm at his door, I knock quietly and wait for a response. I can hear tossing and turning followed by a loud moan. I knock louder and can hear him get up. I swallowhard as the door is opened by Misa. His eye's open wide as he stand in his shorts and tank top. His bare feet look as if they have never entered a shoe and I chuckle to myself. "Saru...What are you...Doing here?" He asks, having to think it through. His confusion makes me smile. _'Looks like he's still the same immature Misa.'_ I look at him with a smile that is more warm then threatening.

"Hey Misaki, I'm just here to chat, can I come in?" I ask with hope hidden behind my voice as I put a hand on my hip for a moment. He nods gripping the door with both hands and I laugh walking inside and removing my shoes. "Sit down, I'll get some snacks."He tells me as he runs like a child to the kitchen. Moving myself to the couch I look up at the T.V to see the same stupid cartoons we used to watch.

I hear him opening and closing cupboards, and perhaps even hopping up on counters. He soon enters with a bowl of chips, a box of pocky, and two pops, on a tray. He smiles as he sets it down on the coffee table. Next he reaches for a remote and turns down the show a little before sitting beside me. "So what's new?"He asks me with curiosity dancing through his words. Everything he does is making me smile at this point. "Only work, although I haven't been able to concentrate much." I tell him with a smile still tuck to my face. Reaching out I grab a pop can and open it with one hand and grab a chip with the other. "Really?Is something wrong?"He asks with honest worry in his tone. Laughing in my mind, I shake my head. "I've been busy thinking about you." I nearly sing this as he stares at me blankly. He breaks away from my gaze and grabs his pop. His hands are shaking a little and he starts to have trouble opening the pop can.

I smile at him and reach over, opening it with my free hand while the other is used to hold me up as I lean. "Something wrong?"I ask him with a warm smile. Misaki's face turns bright red making me chuckle to myself. "No, just a little tired, I had a long day at work yesterday." he tells me not looking me in the eyes even once as he drink his pop with both hands. Misaki acts adorable without meaning to for the thirty minutes we chat.

As we speak I realize just how much he's changed. I'm shocked, but happy. For the first time in a while, we laugh together about jokes, and we chat about life, we act as if we are still friends. I feel something warming my heart a little as he smiles at me, something that melts everything bad away. I consider telling him, but I want to stay by his side a little while longer, just like this, I want to wait for a while before it changes again. So I sit and listen, we whisper small teasing laughs into each others ears. We smile and joke around, and play small pranks on one another, we watch shows, and eat like wild dogs. Soon enough it's 11:00 PM. We snuggle up under the blanket on the couch and watch a comedy together.

I cant understand why he's become so loving, I even consider that it might be a dream, but it's all to real, I form a warm smile on my lips when I see Misaki sleeping on my shoulder. I rest my head on his and smile as I put my arm around him. I slowly fall into a peaceful and long sleep. Everything is relaxing as I rest on his head under the warm blanket.

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I wake up and look to see him still beside me resting with a smile stuck to his face. Laughing to myself I shake him a little but get no response. I shake him again but he only mumbles nonsense and grabs onto my arm tightly. Smiling I spin him to face me and kiss his cheek before going to his ear and whispering "Get up before I eat you!" followed by light knawing on his open shoulder.

He jumped back nearly fliping off the couch with eye's wide open. "I'm awake!I'm awake!" He told me as his voice I couldn't contain myself anymore, I burst out laughing, his expression was priceless as I held my stomach tightly. He stared at me as if I were insane, but when I looked him in the eye he also broke into an uncontrolable laughter. After laughing for what felt like thirty minutes, I struggle to stand pushing myself up using the coffee table. Both of us had fallen on the ground by then so we looked more messy then ever. "Have a good sleep?"I ask him happily as I turn towards the kitchen. "Yea, right up till' the end when a giant monkey tried to eat me!" He joked as he followed me and took out plates and cuttlery on instinct.

"What do you want for breakfast?"I asked him with a smile painted on my face. He turned around and walked towards me with a smile. He took a minute to scan what was in the fridge and pressed his finger to his chin. "How about some eggs, and...Rice? I don't have much right now, so there are limited things to make." He tells me with an embarassed sigh and smile.

I laugh to myself and get everything ready as he makes coffee for the two of us. Soon the food is ready and were eating together at his small table. "This is really good!"He says with his face lighting up as he takes a bite. I smile at him and he smiles back his ears turning a little red. "Thank you, I'm glad you are enjoying it." I say with a warm hearted smile formed on my lips. He eats quickly and messily making me wipe his cheek with a cloth occasionally which makes him blush.

We sit together, and in my head hearts surrounded us, although I wouldn't be surprised if there really were some around us, with this air it's hard to think of anything else. We continue joking around as we eat and soon enough it's 9:00 AM. I smile at him and get out of my chair, I make him dry off the dishes while I wash them. Then we go and get cleaned up for the day. "Hey, how about we start doing this more often?" I ask him as we put on our shoes.

He looks at me with confusion before tying his shoe laces. "What do you mean by that?" He asks with blush painted across his face. I bend down to where he is and smile. "I'm asking if you'll be willing to share an apartment with me." I tell him with a sweet and kind smile on my face. His face looks like a tomato and he stand up taking a minute to cough and try to calm down. "S-sure, I don't see why not." He says trying to act cool as he refuses to look me in the eye. "Good, let's talk more about this later, after work." I say to him as I pull him close and kiss his cheek before opening the door.

I walk down the hall slowly and when I look back I see Misa following close behind me with a bright red face. I laugh to myself.

Soon enough we've parted ways and I'm heading back to work. Entering Scepter 4 has never been more insanely hilarious. Everyone stared at me as I entered smiling, of course I made it seem like murder and not love, so everyone stayed even more far away then usual.

I spend my whole day scaring people, and finding anyway I can to mouth off to my supiriors without getting in trouble for it.

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_**I know this chapter was short, but I think I made it cute, so I hope that makes up for it! I'm sorry if it seemed out of Saru's character I really do try!I'm so happy that you've all stayed this long!I hope you're all excited for the next chapter!I think it's going to be the last one**_

_**I just want to thank a few people who reviewed!:**_

_**Natsuki Nightfall **_

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_**And two Anonymous (You should make accounts, you said such sweet things and I'd love to talk with you~)**_

_**And the followers:**_

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_**THANK YOU! I hope you are all excited for the next chapter!(Also I'm sorry for not adding in the people who favorited but thank you~~)**_


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